tellyjelly

Coronation Street: 12 March 2010

First it was Tootsie, then Simon, now I've lost my remote control. At least the little women are all back at the ranch so perhaps they can find it. Meanwhile the men are pioneering around Blackpool on the hunt for Simon, but not Tootsie, and no doubt they will find him, and George will give up the custody battle, and all will be well on Weatherfield until Peter has another drink.

Eastenders: 11 March 2010

Who could've known that the role of a florist is a cross between that of a priest and a doctor, and with a need for an expert knowledge of flowers thrown in. As we found out when Libby and Patrick tried to trick their way past the assistant in the only all-night florist in the world, the laws of confidentiality mean she could have been arrested if she'd told them who had been in her shop. As a fan of Jean's (Stacey's mum who works on the flower stall in the market, keep up), I think someone should tell her about this law as I'm pretty sure she'd blab to anyone about who's been buying lilies from her.

It was also a night of stolen DVDs as Libby and Patrick liberated the footage from the flower shop, which showed that Lucas rather than Owen had been there - da da daaaa - and worse than this Ian stole the DVD of Marie giving birth. Seeing as she is his silent assistant in his cafe I doubt she'll say anything, but I'm sure she'll give a big shrug of her shoulders when she finds out about the theft.

Famous, Rich and Jobless: 9 March 2010 BBC1

Strictly speaking, none of the celebrities were jobless of course, seeing as they were working on the show to portray how devastating unemployment is for more ordinary people, but I thought I would give it a go anyway. And if you're also concerned about how Meg Matthews (just a minute, did she used to have blonde hair around the time she married into the Gallagher dynasty?) and Camilla Parker Bowles' niece are getting on in the real world, you should tune in too. Larry Lamb looks set to be the Austin Mitchell of this tribe as he fails to grasp the earnest social experiment and instead does his own thing, but it is strange to see some of them crumble after a few days of knockbacks and only £40 to spend. So if you get your kicks from watching celebs being as distressed as everyone else, even though they know they are going home soon, tune in for part two (on 10 March 2010).