tellyjelly

I'm A Celebrity: Kilroy the First (to go)

Unfortunately Kilroy is the first to be voted off (so to speak) this year leaving the likes of Carly and Simon the chance to show even more of their personalities than we have already seen. David Van Day is looking stronger by the minute and the following multiple choice question needs to be solved right away.

Does he remind you of

a) Norman Wisdom (Judy's choice)?, b) Steve Strange (my choice)?, c) don't know, d) don't care.

                                                    

Please send your answers on a postcard and the first to be picked out of the hat will be the winner.

I'm A Celebrity: David Van Day

When Timmy Mallett and David Van Day were introduced as the new jungle - or should that be rain forest - housemates, a sinking feeling came over me and I thought it would be too much 1980s deja vu to handle. Yet again, reality tv has proved me wrong and it turns out that I am interested in how well David Van Day can manipulate the others. I didn't know he had the ability to do this, let alone the energy, and for this he should be made king of the rain forest and given a record deal for the song he has been composing. This may be going too far, but I hope he lasts long enough to at least have time to take over the double decker bus as he promised.

 

Strictly Come Dancing: John Sergeant v James Jordan

John Sergeant's withdrawal from Strictly Come Dancing has received more press attention than it might deserve, having been covered on all the main news programmes including Newsnight as well as the obligatory It Takes Two, but it is intriguing even if you are immune to the appeal of the show. John decides to (quick) step down after numerous criticisms of him and the voting public not taking the dancing seriously and the main voice behind this was James Jordan after he and partner Cherie Lunghi got the boot on Sunday. Now James is saying John has done the wrong thing by leaving and more or less accused him of attention seeking on last night's It Takes Two. It looks to me like John's decision not to be the whipping boy anymore has not been accepted graciously, and I advise James to hang up his pumps and book a three month holiday next autumn as I doubt he'll get far with the voters.

I'm a Celebrity: Kilroy

Apart from Kilroy, the only other person who can be pleased about his stay in the jungle and re-appearance on telly has to be his wife (I think he said they had only been apart for four days in over forty years of marriage). Saying that, the other contestants should be secretly elated as they know they won't be the first to go and the celebrity ego will remain intact. This may sound mean, but speaking on behalf of all loyal daytime telly watchers, we can't forget let alone forgive him for all the times he cut people short on his talk show - and it was his talk show as he never let anyone else get a word in.

Outnumbered

Something strange happened on terrestrial telly last night - a comedy was shown, on BBC1, on a Saturday night, and it was funny. Outnumbered might be a little twee for some, but what a relief to not have to watch a programme that involved dancing dogs or people, or Simon Cowell lording it over more star struck ordinary members of the public (as they are always referred to). Speaking of which, I can't help thinking he should get his comeuppance some time soon. It seemed to be heading that way on the news in the middle of the week when he was seen to mock someone on the American Pop Idol/X Factor who then went on to commit suicide, but his reign continues as people wait for his pronouncements as though he were God - or talented in any way.

Rich Kid, Poor Kid

The premise for this documentary seems to be that it's possible for two teenagers living on the same street to live such contrasting lives and I suppose the film maker was saying this could be a metaphor for the rest of England. Except these are real people being observed and with little background information to support how divided this country is it came across as prurient and judging of both girls - of the richer one for her initial inherited snobbery and of the poorer one because she didn't have much money. I wonder if it was 'personalised' in such a way because the viewers couldn't be presumed to take in a film that explains the disparity of wealth without such a narrow focus.

Lady Randy: Churchill's Mother

This programme was proof that Churchill had at least one likeable person in his family despite the voiceover and some of the contributors trying to get us to think otherwise. One of the more fascinating insights into his mother was that she wore a musical bustle that played when she sat down and she had relationships with men other than her husband. The latter was the main focus and I wonder if we were supposed to be shock, especially as this was reiterated on a number of occasions. We were also told she had the eyes of a panther. I'm surprised he didn't ask for them back, but that's another story.

Celebrity Scissorhands

Steve Strange's hair allergy has finally got the better of him and,for now, he has left the salon for good. If this had happened in the last two series, it might have been difficult to replace his artistic genius, but now we have Zammo of Grange Hill and Just Say No emerging as a worthy rival. The pink pom-pom that he superglued to a woman's forehead in the name of a creative makeover will probably never be bettered, and is an idea that Steve Strange, or anyone else, would never have come up with. It might even catch on, you never know.

Coronation Street: 3rd November 2008

Last night, Rosie escaped from The Collector, and Fiz's over-acting, after five weeks of impersonating John Stape's grandmother's cat, but hasn't the time passed quickly? She hasn't missed much really, except the news of what happens if you make prank calls to Andrew Sachs. Oh, and Tony Gordon has had Liam killed and employed Gavin from Emmerdale to do his dirty work. She might be surprised to learn that Janice has been accepted back into the fold, though, but let us not forget that in soapland characters do and say the most terrible things to each other and for the purposes of the plot they all forgive each other in the next episode.

Dead Set: October 31st 2008

Borrowing liberally from the recent celluloid zombie uprising, Dead Set on E4 breathed life into Big Brother by adding copious helpings of death and undeath.  With echoes of both Dawn and Shaun of the Dead, spatterings of 28 Days Later and a premise akin to films like Wrong Turn 2:Dead End and Reality Kills, Dead Set pits a new set of Big Brother contestants and some production staff against what appears to be the rest of the world.

 

It works at times, as set pieces are energetically filmed, gore flows well enough to feed the appetite of the horror hungry watchers and the end is… well, the end.  The makers go down the same route as the classic zombie films, making social commentary in the context and hitting some nails squarely into the right heads.  This manifests well in some of the ‘dumb’ comments of the contestants, the casual swearing and the bullying, whilst going over the top in other ways, such as the mad butcher scenes with the producer.  The most horrific moment though has to be when said producer needs to relieve himself while trapped in a room with a squealing contestant, as a ravenous Davina McCall tries to butt her way through the locked door. Unpleasant on so many levels.

 

Ultimately Dead Set didn’t work as well as it could have.  A longer lead up before zombification would have helped establish the characters at a more emotional level rather than the Big Brother stereotypes that were delivered and I can’t help but wonder just what the impact would have been if instead of presenting it as a drama straight off, the producers had played it as a straight reality show until the undead arrived.  We could have had a War of the Worlds for the noughties.

 

Worth watching…if you’ve got the stomach for it!