tellyjelly

Celebrity Big Brother: The Final, 29 Jan 2010

So this year's winner is, ..., Alex Reid. Once known as a cage-fighter and sometimes erstwhile partner of Katie Price, he has been reincarnated as the winner of the last Celebrity Big Brother and as an all-round good guy. All he needs now is a manager who will look after his interests rather than everybody else's.

Celebrity Big Brother: Wed 27 Jan 2010

Ivana was out first in the semi-final, and after her came Nicola T. There was then a sigh of relief all round when Davina presented herself as the mystery guest dressed as Nicola - we were only relieved it wasn't Jordan.

It was strange how Davina managed to achieve her self-professed ambition of entering the house with apparently no pleasure whatsoever. Not long after she went in, disguised as a chicken, she proceeded to run away from the remaining housemates and appeared to be scared VJ was going to pull her head off. Don't know where she got that idea from.

Celebrity Big Brother: 22 Jan 2010

Last night Stephen Baldwin and then Sisqo were evicted, and so Ivana beat them hands down - but did she Trump them? Who knows, you decide.

Celebrity Big Brother:18 Jan 2010

What an eventful night. Lady Sov was evicted and the live speed nominating round has thrown up the American surprise of Cisqo, Stephen Baldwin and Ivana Trump. Since the Big Brother peoples have now taken all my money, having tried to vote Lady Sov out, I doubt I will be getting into debt for this crew. I'll just have to trust to God to make the right decision.

Celebrity Big Brother: 17 Jan 2010

I thought Kevin the Teenager went past his sell by date about 10 years ago, but no, he's in the BB house waiting to be evicted on tonight's (18 Jan) show. Yes of course I'm joking and really mean Lady Sov. Putting hilarity aside for the moment, she's getting on the nation's collective nerves so much I bet Channel Four are thinking of keeping Big Brother on for next year because of the money made in eviction phone calls.

Celebrity Big Brother: Eviction Night, 15 Jan 2010

The first to be evicted from this year's show is Kat, of the Rolling Stones ex-girlfriend fame, and Heidi Fleiss, Madame to the stars. It was a surprise for anyone who watches the show that Lady Sov stayed in while Heidi was sent packing by the voters, but there never is any accounting for other people's taste or humour.

Last night's episode also featured cage fighting Alex being mentally pummelled by born-again Stephen Baldwin. Viewers can only hope that Alex, who appears to be extremely impressionable, won't be commandeered into a cult when he leaves, as Svengalis around the world will be queuing up to get him to join them.

Eastenders: 14 and 15 Jan 2010

What a shame the ditzy blonde solicitor lost the papers to Archie's will in the sudden gust of wind. If this hadn't happened, we would have been able to find out who the main beneficiary was on Thursday rather than Friday.Instead, we had to wait - to hear Roxie is the new owner of the Queen Vic and, unlikely as it sounds, is now 3 million better off. Meanwhile, Janine has nothing but an office toy to keep her amused and turns to blackmailing Ian once again to supplement her income. This is her version of signing on after all.

Coronation Street: 8 Jan 2009

If ever a man should have asked for a receipt after handing over £4,000 to a loan shark, Joe was that man. Don't forget he has already given his van to him without signing any forms, and now this situation has arisen where the nasty man carries on stalking him even though he has paid up.

As sympathetic as we are to anyone with financial problems, especially in the current snowy climate, you can't help hoping Joe either sorts this out or gets sorted out for good. For the last time, enough already of the loan shark story - we now appreciate we should never borrow from such men and have learned Joe's lesson even if he hasn't.

Eastenders: 7 January 2009

The entrance of a new character in last night's show really was a show stopper. Nobody seemed to recognize her, which was strange as she was the mother of two of them (Roxie and Ronnie) and sister-in-law of the third (Peggy). For a moment, confused viewers thought they were watching Acorn Antiques in Albert Square but then the theme tune started and we were brought back to our dulled senses.

While we're on the subject, of complaining about Eastenders, I would like to make a heartfelt plea to the producers and the BBC in general. Please, please, please, never make us watch people playing strip Twister again. It went off the embarrassment scale into the 'let's blow the telly up rather than watch this' territory.

Any Weather News: Dec 2009 - Jan 2010

I think by now everyone in Britain must know why we are having a cold snap - There is a block of high pressure that is stopping or diverting the usually milder weather from the west. This is also allowing in the freezing air from Russia. This means it has been freezing cold. We get it. Please stop telling us about it now and move on to something else on the news, specially extended bulletins, This Morning and any other daytime show.

Celebrity Big Brother: Day One, 3 Jan 2010

I can't help thinking this year's show is going to end up being yet another reality show vehicle for the Jordan/Price empire. Two of her ex-partners are on this year and this is only days after we were reliably informed, by the News of the World, that they had a set-to at Jordan's New Year's Eve party. Really? They both denied it, because it wasn't true, but shame on BB producers for thinking these would be interesting housemates.